Thursday, October 20, 2011

Sometimes it is dark in here

The way I would describe it is that you are on a long journey and you have two courses of action: go forward or stay put, and staying put only just delays having to go forward.

The journey takes you into a forest. You didn't notice when you entered the forest and you don't know how deep into the forest you are.

You are alone. There are no animals. There seems to be no other life than the trees.

The Trees tower over you. Trees so tall and dense that you cannot see the tops of them, you can only see the dark damp trunks, yet you still feel cramped, you always feel like there is a wall of tree trunks just an arm length away yet you can also see for miles, you see miles of emptiness except for the trees.

Sometimes, the forest gets noisy, the noise is both close and far, it is also inescapable.

Most of the time the forest is quiet, the quiet stretches further than the endless and unseeable horizon.

There is no sun.

There is always a hunger no matter how much eating has been done.

There is always tiredness no matter how much sleeping has been done.

There is always coldness no matter how much you do to keep warm.

It is a crowded cold dark emptiness that stretches forever.

You think you can remember a time when you were not in the forest but those memories seem like they belong to someone else.

You forget the destination for your journey. You think there was a destination but you cannot remember if you made that thought up or not.

You forget the purpose of it all but you trudge forward because you think that is what you are supposed to do. You wonder where the thought of trudging forward came from, you think it was taught to you but you cannot remember meeting any teachers.
But then the canopy opens and light reaches the ground. You can see the sky. You notice that the chill is gone from your bones. But you are still in the forest. The trees are just as thick and endless but they no longer seem to be at arm length. There seems to be more room.

You still don't know how far into the forest you are and you still don't know how far it is to go -- and you are still alone but at least there seems to be hope.

And you have found your a familiar spoon.

1 comment:

Melissa said...

I hate being in the forest, but it's good to know there is someone there with me.