Wednesday, August 31, 2005

there is usually another side to the same story

So, she said "Aww, look at the baby, that's too bad" and she showed me an infant being evacuated from a rooftop because of the floods.

I said "Maybe, the baby had it coming"

have you noticed the spiral downward?

If I were to allow myself to get angry over the thing I would stand up, grab his cell phone from him and place it on his desk and tell him to sit the fuck down while he is talking loudly on his cell phone because I really don't care to be a part of his conversation by him walking back and forth in front of my cube

but that is all unnecessary because I do have the ability to tune him out

but the dude should really sit down

I'll work it into a conversation some day

and he'll most likely say something like "Oh, I didn't know I was walking around talking loudly on my cell phone. I have trouble hearing, so I talk loud."

hopefully, he'll get the message

and I'll be thinking "it's loudly not loud"

Lauren the bartender said...

"If we start serving breakfast Tim would be here three times a day"

Listen, I know you got eggs and bacon in the kitchen so what are we waiting for?

I can be annoying at times

So, I'm faxing something, so I'm in the copy room and I was waiting for the fax to fax the fax that was before my fax when I noticed one of the copiers was shut off. So, I turned it on and it indicated that there were multiple jams. So, I started the unjamming process and I was making good progress, I had it down to one jam when somebody walked in and said that the jams where jammed too bad to be unjammed.

"I'm almost there" I said.

"It's beyond fixing"

I pause for dramatic effect.

"Don't you know I'm a miracle man?" I assured him with a smile.

So, then I was on the hook to fix the thing and I did have my doubts there for a moment. I even had to find a piece of cover stock to shove through paper path to unclog it.

phony street name signs

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

I gave her the tickets to tonight's game over five weeks ago.

I remember thinking "I hope it doesn't rain"

I've been watching the weather since last week, since last week every report has called for rain.

Monday she was telling me of all the problems in her life and she added to the list that I probably gave her the tickets because I knew it was going to rain.

Today it was raining, off and on.

Outside, I watched the skies.

Inside, looking out a window, I watched the puddles to see how many drops were falling.

I think I even said a prayer.

I was still watching as I went to the second job thirty minutes before the scheduled start of the game, then I forgot and then just now I remembered. It's the top of the six, Red Sox 4 Tampa Bay 5
I asked how she was doing and she told me.

It was mostly bad but there was room for hope.

sometimes I lack respect for the folks I have to deal with

"You might be the smartest of the dumbfucks but you're still a dumbfuck"

Doesn't answer to the name Spooky

If you see Spooky please call

yeah. i'm a riot

"You had eleven beers?" she poured the two whiskey sours so she already knew about those

"Dick was here earlier. He had at least three."


"Can I help you?"

"Venti White Chocolate Mocha"

"With or without whip cream?"






"Venti White Chocolate Mocha with whip for Rusty!"

she told her story of how she almost got into a fist fight with the cab driver who was trying to charge her for a toll he didn't incur on the trip to her house. she was still angry about it. she is always getting into it with the cabbies, or so it seems.

"obviously you're still upset. is it worth the $3 to be that upset?"

"it was 4.50 and it's the principal"

"but still that's too much anger for four dollars and fifty cents"

she disagreed with me and let me know it with some hand motion and a facial expression and by just stopping the conversation.

"next time you have a problem you should get the guy's medallion number and report him to the hackney division. they're pretty good about getting on those guy's cases. i know the guy over there hates them and all you need is their number and a description of the guy and they will call them in for a hearing"

Sunday, August 28, 2005

so, poker. I said I was going to try and win and I left the table with $21 dollars more than I came with so that was pretty good.

Folks, went crazy over the generic cheese balls I brought which were in a comically large container which is the only reason I bought it. You would have thought they were some sort of Hot Cheetos, not that I've been able to find Hot Cheetos in my neck of the woods but I hear they are almost as good as crack, or something like that.

Friday, August 26, 2005

So, what I found out at lunch today.

the barkeep has been pierced in her lip, her tongue, both nipples, and her hood. She only has hardware in her tongue and her hood. I formally only knew about the tongue.

one of my poker buddies has had a three way and there was only one woman.

that same poker buddy didn't know that the top of the hood could be pierced.

I'm here all next week

So, maybe an espresso drink wasn't the best choice.

That same administrator, who I actually like, was talking to my direct supervisor, my direct supervisor sits in the cube next to mine.

A different co-worker was passing by my cube and asked if I completed that purchase order for him. Anyone can do these purchase orders it just seems that I'm the only one that does them. I don't mind because I have a good working relationship with the contractor of which the request will be made.

I stood up again.

"Listen, I got your email but I haven't done anything with it yet because I've been doing everybody's job but my own!"

I then smiled at the dude and made a head motion to the administrator so my co-worker would know I was just joking about.

I sat back down.

The administrator then came over to my cube and asked if he should take my map out of the trash for me.

"No. The project is over." I said calmly without looking at him

"It's really not up to you when the project is over"

"Then who's it up to? Because come mid-October, I'm not going to be finished!"

"It's up to the *big boss*."

Then the *big boss* came by.

"Where's that project?" the big boss asked, he was joking.

"It's in the trash" the administrator said.

"It's in trash?" - big boss

"Yeah, but he's printing a new one" - administrator

I was printing a new one.

I knew I should have waited longer to print the new one.

The joke was over, but by then I had already sent my message and even the Big Boss heard it and promises of changes were made.

I smiled at the administrator then said "It was a pretty good show though. Wasn't it?"

"Yeah, I was very good. I'm going to come by later for the afternoon show."

That's Mr. X

So, after the show and after I got my co-worker/poker buddy back on track, I went for a coffee drink. I went to Starbucks.

I guess Starbucks has been having trouble with folks getting the wrong order so, recently they have been asking for customer's names. I was the only one in line and there wasn't a soul waiting for an order. At least no soul I could see but they asked for my name anyway.

"I always want to say Mr. X but my name is Tim" I said.

"We can put Mr. X if you want" I was told

"I would like that"

"Grande Iced Caramel Macchiato for X" I heard later.

I was going to say that's Mr. X but I didn't.

'Above the fold' is a newspaper term, firstly.

poker tomorrow

I think I'll try to win this time


some junkie died of a heroin overdose in Boston Common. It made the front page of the Boston Herald. The story would have been 'above the fold' if the Herald wasn't in a tabloid format.

The junkies dying in the doorways of the public housing developments do not get front page coverage.


I looked up 'above-the-fold'

and the first sites that show up refer to above the fold as an internet term and don't even mention the phrase's origin and it's still present day use.

I wouldn't mind so much if a webpage had a fold but it doesn't


So, it was some of my best work.

My spies told me that I was about to be asked to help a co-worker with their job. I was told to hide.

I remained un-hid.

Many times, for years, others and I have tried to get this co-worker help because sometimes where he is at becomes too busy for one person to do. Presently, I'm on a huge project that has a deadline that has been printed in both major newspapers and time is tight, I really don't need any extra things to do.

So, some administrator came by my desk and asked me to help.

Usually, I'm cucumber cool. Usually, the worst folks will get is sarcasm with a bit of a bite. So, when I make a scene it's a show worth watching.

So, I stood up.

"I guess my project is over" I declared and then threw what I was 'working' on into my trash bin and then removed a map of my project and shoved that into the my recycle bin.

I then went to help. Leaving both the administrator and one of my supervisors slack-jawed.

What I think is great about this is that what I was 'working' on was actually a blank form that I hadn't started filling out yet and the map I threw into the recycle bin was outdated and I needed to print a new version. And, I probably bought myself more time on the project or at least set the foundation for an excuse.

My displays are mostly show.

I'm a showman
So, after the second job. I went home to drop off the truck to jump on public transportation to go downtown but when I got there I decided to stay home.

So, if you did dropped by my regular place and thought you were talking to me, but I was just being coy about it, it wasn't me.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

There is no 'r' sound in Jager

So, I picked up the someone I had to pick up and I dropped them off where they needed to be dropped and then I thought "Ah, finished. Now I can go adrinking" but then I remembered that I really should check in at the other job.

So, I check in at the other job and there are things to do but small stuff…

So, what was the point of this post?

So, I forgot. Sue me.

So, one thing I was asked to do was to print out another copy of something so I printed out another copy the something only, the printer jams. I like my printer. It's been faithful and true and I ask it to do a lot of funky stuff on all sorts of paper of various sizes, textures, and thicknesses and it almost always comes through for me so every once in a while when it jams on the mundane, I just shrug my shoulders and tell it that "I understand". But what's weird is that it jammed on page nine, just like it did last night. There is nothing odd on page nine and it didn't jam on page eighteen so it's not like a-jam-every-nine-pages type thing.

So, anyway… I forgot the new point of this post while resending page nine.

So, I guess it's hopeless or maybe just pointless.

So, I'm finished.

So, I think I will go drinking. I'll be at the regular place by the Jagah* machine getting complimentary shots from some incredibly thin brunette which will make the bartender behind the bar slightly jealous and then the bartender will most likely serve me warm beers.

So, if you're around and you drop by and they see that you're a friend o'mine you might get a couple comp-ed drinks yourself. (note: I try to make up for the 'free' drinks in the tips but usually my math skills are a little bit off when it comes to the figuring-things-out part of the night)

*I'm from Boston. There is no 'r' sound in Jager. It's pronounced Yaa-gahh.

how charming

So, I often have lunch at the place at which I often drink.

I had lunch there today.

"Timmy, are you coming back later?"

"I don't think so"

"Well, I think you should because I'll be selling shots. If you sit by the Jagermeister machine I'll feed you shots all night long" She then pointed to the Jagermeister machine.

I try to avoid the seat by the Jagermeister machine, there is little circulation over there so the air gets hot and stale but usually the area isn't as crowded as other parts of the bar but it's furthest from the men's room. I was working on an off day yesterday so I had figured that I was due an after work visit to my favorite drinking place but I do have to pick up someone up directly after work. So, I was trying to schedule everything in my mind.

"I'll see what I can do"

Having incredible irresistible charm has it's down side

...if I did at least it was at a high price

It always happens when I take a day off from the day job to show up at the second job. I'll show up and it'll be just like old times, just like it was ten years ago.

Even though my office is up the stairs out of sight, they always seem to know I'm in the office. They know I'm there so they'll come by and ask things. They ask me things in person that they wouldn't ask otherwise. I'll answer their questions as I wonder what they would do if I want sitting in front of them. I always seem to have the answers, that's probably the reason they come by my desk.

I always wonder if I made the right choice. The choice that provided me with heath care, a retirement plan, security, paid vacations, paid holidays, paid sick days, paid personal days, a house, a truck... I'm an old pro there too, folks come by my day-job desk all the time for answers as well, I usually have some sort of answer for them.

I wonder if I sold out.

as of today I'm growing it back

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

I got a post card

Little g is at camp. She sent my a post card

Hi Tim. It's Little g here. What are you doing right this minute? I bet it's eating potato chips. I'm having a good time but there are some councilors that are getting on my last nerve.

Little g

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

I really want...

I really want a coffee right now but I don't have any means of making coffee where I'm at and I don't want to drive somewhere to get coffee because then I will lose my parking space and have to walk a half mile to and fro

just in case you were wondering
there is too much of a buzz in the office today


for the most part I just bask in the sun while the busy world occasionally bumps into me

some notice I don't seem to care when the activity interrupts my peace

some think there is no danger because for many times they have seen no teeth

some others know the teeth are there and they also know they will be used

especially on the cocky and rude

so they watch


Sunday, August 21, 2005

So, it felt good rolling the mower, the snow blower, the power washer, the tiller and the mulcher/chipper into the shed. They all used to be just sitting about the house and they are all gasoline powered and I'm certain that violates some sort of fire code but sometimes I like living on the edge.

My niece was at the house on Saturday while I was roofing the shed. She was handing me the roofing shingles and roofing nails, helping the best a three year old could, when she needed to do something back inside the house she told me "Timmy, I'm going inside, so you're gonna havta help yourself"


There have been a couple times in my life where I thought I was just taking up space in other people's lives so I would recluse myself.

I found out later that what I saw as taking up space someone else saw as filling a hole.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

you make me wonder even though I find most of my world wonderless
"Hey! Where you going?"

"Why do you want to know?" she who walks with a cane asked

"Because what if something happens and you don't come back? I can send someone to go look for you."

"There are a lot of people in this building, I'm sure someone will do something."

"I dunno... They don't care about you like I care about you"

and then the peanut gallery laughed

Happy Birthday Jen

It's her birthday today and she'll be working at the bar from 5PM to closing.

She's twenty seven and studying to be a nurse.

She's the reason I got hooked.

the shed series

the floor - completed

parts about

there is a one piece missing, some 2x3 that is cut at angles at both ends. I was supposed to have six of them and I only have five. It's a piece that holds up part of the roof.

I'm glad I have thousands of dollars worth of tools in the basement and various lumber all around the house.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

So, I was thinking the other day

I was thinking I want to do something creative

something that I've never seen before

but creativity really isn't my thing

my thing is reworking other things, changing them a bit like this picture below of a 3-D puzzle of a dragon fly (it's sitting on a quarter).

I scanned the parts, traced them into a vector image and rescaled them to a relatively huge size, I think it worked out to be 1600 times larger, and then cut it out on a bandsaw and came up with what's in the picture below

even though, in the photos they kinda look like the same size, in the second photo you can just make out a little green speck sitting on the wing just past the hump on the dragonfly's back - that little green speck is the dragonfly in the top photo

lately I've been thinking about doing things in leather. I used to do things with leather as a hobby and I still have all the stuff and the idea I got was to make a dragonfly out of leather, maybe about five to six inches long. I would cut two mirror images of each piece out and then stitch the two pieces together back to back for stiffness.

I would stain it a dark color with maybe a little iridescent paint for highlights

and then I would sell it on Ebay
mostly, I'm a lazy unmotivated lump of a low level form of humanity but sometimes, usually when it matters most, I rock.

...and somtimes even roll

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

if I pull this project off they will be talking about me until there are no more personal transportation devices that need to be parked on the street at night

Monday, August 15, 2005

Some times

I'm a dreamless dreamer
So, what's kinda cool about the shed,

once I erect it...

I have yet to get it up...

I might need some things held while I get things rigid...

anyway, the shed's large enough for a riding mower and my lawns, I have decided, are large enough for a riding mowing. So, I can get a riding mower.

I'm tired of pushing a mower.

or maybe a motorcycle
I was left a note that someone never received a check so I checked the checks and they all checked out so I called the bank and the check had yet to post. I printed out a copy of the check I wrote and gave it to the person whose claim it was that they were missing a check. She wrote me a note on that same copy that she never received such check and asked that I write her a new one. I don't like checks just floating about so I tried to find the check but the check would not be found and as I was finishing writing a note to the owner of the company, requesting that she assign some staff member to the task of searching files for the check, I got a feeling that the check in question might have fallen behind her mailbox like some of her mail does so I looked in her mail box but nothing had fallen behind but I did check the mail that was present and there was the check in a sealed envelope with her name on it. I held it to a light source just to confirm it.

So, on the copy of the check I printed out for her, on which she wrote her note, I wrote her back using a Sharpie marker.

"This check was lying down sideways in your mailbox. I have since stood it up. - Tim"

Sunday, August 14, 2005

"What ya doing?"

"Nothing much" is what I said but I was actually in the process of buying a shed. I wondered how much of something I would have to be doing before I would change my answer from the normal one I had just given to something a bit more accurate.

"Get out of bed" Lady G said.

"I'm not always in bed. I'm actually buying a shed"

There is a need a shed because currently there is a show blower sitting in the room that will be the formal living room, a chipper/mulcher and a tiller sitting in the room that will make my single living room into a double living room, and there is a power washer and a lawnmower in what will be a study, all of which and a bunch of other collected items should be in a shed.

I've needed a shed for some time I just never wanted to buy a shed but on this day I was doing my best to buy a damn shed.

I went to the discount lumber yard, where I know they have been advertising shed kits for half past forever. I walked around a bit, the place was just like I remembered even though I've never actually been in this particular lumber yard, it was just like one to which my dad used to take me.

I walked around to see what they had and to maker certain they actually had the continually advertised sheds. The sheds are advertised with sample fronts hanging on the building. There was a staff member helping someone load in the actual yard part of the lumber yard so I asked him how I could buy a shed.

"What shed?"

"The one with the gable roof" I said as I pointed to the wall with the shed fronts.

"I don't think we have those"

"What are those over there?" I asked as I pointed to some very large orange plastic shrink wrapped bundles with labels that indicated they where sheds.

"I think those are different"

"How much are those then?" I asked and the dude walks back to where he could see the shed fronts hanging on the building and reads me the price off of the wall.

"I'll take one" I said even though I had some questions about what he originally thought I was talking about. He walked over to the orange packages and looked at the top one, there was about a stack of eight.

"I can't read the label. The rain got to it. I don't know what this is" He said as he was half-assedly examining the beat to heck top shed. The one I wasn't going to but even if I knew what it was.

"What about this one?" I asked as I pointed to the one directly below it. The one with the readable label that said 8x8 garden shed - gable roof

"I'll have to move the top one and all this stuff" he said as he pointed to two half filled pallets of what not in front of the most likely never bought sheds.

I just stood quiet because I agreed.

"How do I pay? Do I need a sku number or anything? Do I just go in and pay and bring a slip to you?"

"You just go inside and pay and bring me a receipt for $368"

The dude followed me inside and mentioned to one of the cashiers that I was buying a shed when it would be my turn in line. I was third in the queue.

"I would like to buy a shed" I said when it was my turn.

"How many?"

"Just the one" I said with a smile.

"Okay. How much?"

"369" (yeah, I was a dollar off) is what I said instead of the "Hell you tell me!" which first came to mind and then he proceeded to ring me up for some mystery general item for the price of $369 and I wondered what would have happened if I said 120. He gave me a 5% discount which I then worried about because I was instructed to bring back a receipt for $368.

I walked back to the yard part of the lumber yard and produced my receipt and before looking at it the dude asked what I was driving and where it was so I pointed at my black truck for the second time that day because he had asked before as well. He then looked at the receipt and then looked at it some more.

"He gave you a 5% discount?"

"Yup. At first I thought it was because of the tax free weekend but then he told me he took another 5% off"

"He probably gave you my discount because that's what I get."

I just stood silent.

I won't even go into the production it was to get it into my truck.

Friday, August 12, 2005

this cracks me up because some times I'm like this

and one time when things were looking bright
I started whittling on a stick one night
and who said "Hey, that's dynamite?"

Nobody - Johnny Cash - American III, Solitary Man
I was thinking last night

thinking about secret blogs

some folks have secret blogs

and I thought maybe I need a secret blog

but then I thought it's not a secret blog I need

it's a public blog I need

because this here is the secret blog

I want to say to the people I meet "Here's that photo I took" and stuff as such
The plan was to post a bit of video because sometimes in the videos you get to see me crack a smile.

I've tried to catch it in self portraits but the shutter always takes too long because once I think about something to smile about and push the shutter button I'm no longer thinking about what I was smiling about.

…But my broadband connection is down and I'm not going to upload video on a dial up connection which is all I have at the moment.

I had a dream the other day. She was in my house, the house I live in now but the whole layout was different and nothing looked the same but I knew it was my house, the house I live in now.

It had a soda fountain machine with six different flavors and even though I lived in the house for years I didn't know it worked until one of my guests went over and used it, that very day.

The house, my house, had wall to wall shag carpeting blue in colour, a light blue. It was very displeasing to the eyes.

I was trying to be a good host and show her around but she seemed like she wanted to have a look around herself, so I let her.

he entered the elevator and I noticed that he smelled of old cigarettes and new booze and I thought "I'm glad I don't smoke"

Thursday, August 11, 2005

"I don't like the way you're talking about my fan" is what I said to my niece's aunt who had just said my niece was being fresh with her.

My niece has a habit of announcing my presence to everyone in the room when I enter because she knows of the superstar I really am.

"Your fan?"

"Yes. My fan"


"that was back when I gave a shit"

there was a pause after I said that maybe because that statement seems so unworthy of the hero's song that usually is sung for me

it almost makes me want to change


next on the party shuffle

Name - Artist - Album
Jack and Dianne - John Mellencamp - The Best That I Could Do
One Man - Lori McKenna - Bittertown
Suit of Lights - Elvis Costello - King of America
When I Go - Dave Carter with Tracy Grammer - When I Go
When I Go - Johnny Cash - American III: Solitary Man
A Sense Of Wonder - Van Morrison - Best Of Vol. 2
Commotion - Creedence Clearwater Revival - The Best Of Creedence Clearwater Revival [UK]
12 Bar Blues - Bruce Robison - Wrapped
The Ballad of the Kingsmen - Todd Snider - East Nashville Skyline
Take, Take, Take - The White Stripes - Get Behind Me Satan
Worlds Apart - Bruce Springsteen - The Rising
When I first arrive at the day job I notice that some lights weren't lit so I look into the electrical panel and checked the circuit breakers. I looked and noticed that none of the breakers looked tripped so I walked away. I walked away knowing that sometime breaker trip but they don't look tripped. I walked away knowing that possibly resetting all the breaker might fix the problem. I walked away because I didn't want to shut the power off at every desk because I didn't know if folks were working on things or not.

Some buddy else walked in, an hour after me, noticed that the lights were out, looked into the electrical panel, noticed that none of the circuit breakers looked tripped and then proceeded to reset every circuit breaker individually.

I don't know about where you work but my computer doesn't have an uninterruptible power source (UPS) hooked up to it, so my computer shut off.

I stood up and noticed the culprit standing across the way at the breaker box and shouted "Thanks. It's not like I was doing anything important on my computer" to which the culprit then offered his apologies.

The truth is I wasn't doing anything important on my computer at the time of the interruption but I felt that the guy should be at least be made aware of the fact that you just can't go around shutting the power off without letting folks know before hand during normal business hours.

If this had happened on Tuesday I would have gone ape shit on the guy but today I'm going for mellow.
So, Wednesday I slept in a bit, did nothing until noon time, decided that I would go downtown for lunch because Danielle would be working the day shift, if she survived the night and I was actually a little concerned about her.

She survived. The cheeseburger club was on the specials so I ordered that as Danielle asked me about last night because she was having trouble figuring out when she was having the worst of it.

"When did you get here?"

"Eleven thirty"

"Because I threw up ten minute earlier than that, someone was telling me it was ten but I didn't think it was that early."

"You looked pretty bad. I felt bad for you. I was going to hang out upstairs with you but you didn't look like you wanted company"

"No, I really didn't and I had these two regulars that were there, and they're nice guys but they just kept on wanting to talk to me and I really just wanted to be left alone"

The plan was for just lunch and then get some stuff done but when I got there my boss was there and then a buddy came in and then both of them had to leave but my boss was going to come back and he asked me to save his seat and then when he got back there was an earlier than normal shift change because Danielle still wasn't feeling great so Emily came in and then she started talking with me so I ended up staying till 6:30PM.

It all seemed very familiar.
Tuesday I had had enough, enough of the day job and enough of the second job, I made it through both of them but I did decide to take Wednesday off by using a personal day.

Tuesday night I finished the second job at 11PM which is earlier than normal for me but it was certainly later than I had wished it to be. When I got home I did some time calculations and figured I could take public transportation to downtown and stay at a certain establishment until they closed at 2AM.

I walked through the door at 11:30PM, downstairs was crowded with the karaoke crowd so I went upstairs. Danielle was upstairs and she didn't look happy. Few of the bartenders like working the upstairs bar and she isn't one of the few and to make matters worse she had a cold with a fever but there really wasn't anyone else to call in to cover her shift so she came into work anyway.

Seeing Danielle actually made me realize that my lot really wasn't all that bad. I order a beer which she picked up the bill for and then I ordered a shot of Stoli Raz. She really didn't look like she wanted any company and that was the best I had to offer so I went back downstairs.

Downstairs, it was still standing room only, I ordered a beer, which the bartender picked up the bill for, and wanted for a stool.

I actually meant to type 'waited for a stool' but 'wanted' works too

I got a stool another beer later. Chit chatting with the barkeeps established me as a regular which cause the guy next to me to ask questions, the answers to which he rewarded with a beer, then a shot, then a beer and then a shot.

He had a lot of questions.

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

So, after struggling through this workday, I decided to take tomorrow off. I actually decided that at 10:30AM

I submitted the paperwork and I was asked "You taking tomorrow off?"

Normally I would have some glib remark but instead my reply was "Yeah, before I kill someone."

So, I can't guarantee that I will not kill anyone tomorrow but I'm pretty certain it will not be anyone at the day job.
I secretly think I'm invincible but I would never say that out loud.

My secret thought causes me to make rash decisions sometimes.

I have yet not to survive

but I'm starting to tire of the bruises.
"I might come back. I have to go the second office."

"To check mouse traps?"

"No. ...I don't remember telling you about that"

"I was here when you got that call, when you were collecting your bottle caps" she pointed to the other end of the bar.

"I took a picture of those caps."

"No you didn't." she said with an eye roll.

"What?! It was a good shot."

"What are you a photographer of something?"

I'm more of a photo taker


from the past

I showed her the picture when I brought in photos of my nieces. One of her coworkers agreed it was a good shot.

I take photos
I was at the second office late last night, it was supposed to be a simple task.

I guess it was a simple task in retrospect. It was a simple task complicated by various small problems, problems such as printer jams and documents protected by passwords.

I retyped some of the things because I didn't like the looks of it. I tried to just let it go but I could not, I just delayed the process with arguing with myself.

I'm obsessive about some things and other things I couldn't care less about. I wish I could pick and choose which things but I can't.


I want to just go off on folks

I want to just call in sick

I want to just to be irresponsible

I want to just be undependable

I want to just walk on by

...but I don't

Sunday, August 07, 2005

but then again my niece thinks I'm the stupid one...

So, there was this guy wearing a business suit and a gorilla mask passing out business cards that on one side where advertising the History Channel’s show Ape to Man and on the other side it looked like a regular business card. One of my buddies approached me carrying such a card.

“Hey, did you see that guy in the gorilla suit?”

“No, but yesterday there was a guy just in a gorilla mask”

“Yeah, that’s the guy. He’s passing out these cards for this show and do you know what’s best about it?”


“His name is Mann” and he showed me the card as he was explaining that the guy in the ape mask advertising the show Ape to Man is really, actually named Mann and he’s dressed like an ape.

He didn't actually elbow me in the ribs and asked if I got it but I had the distinct impression that is what he wanted to do.

I took the card and looked at it. It read:
A. T. Mann
123 Apedale Road
Chimpville, CA 01234

and a phone number with some other piece of information I have since forgotten.

As I pointed at the initials of the guy's name I said "Ape to Man. A. T. Mann, Ape to Man, it’s a joke"

"Yeah, I know but the guy's name is Mann"

"No, it's just a promotional thing" I said in vain because he still didn’t get it. "Listen I can guarantee you that there is no Chimpville California. It's made up" also was said in vain.
I hate that filing system that I just searched through.

And whoever has been using it lately doesn’t understand the system because some things were woefully misfiled which caused me to search through three years of records. There are things I’m still missing.

My three year old niece was in the backyard while I was mowing.

“Timmy, did you hit something?”

“Yup, a rock”

“Oh, because I thought I heard you hit something. Which rock?”

So, I walked her over to the rock which I hit with the mower blade and pointed out the scar that the rock now had in it.

“That’s why you have to pick them up and throw them over there” she said as she tossed the rock to the bottom of the fence line where I never mow.

Thanks for the info, Em.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

all two of them

She pouted as she mentioned that she was going to be turning 25 this October. Her birthday is six days after mine. She thought for a bit and got a half smile and then told me that Jen would be turning 27.

“What’s good is that both of my friends are older” she continued.

She then paused a bit so I jumped in.

“Both of your friends? That doesn’t sound too good for you.”

She laughed a bit “Yeah, both of my friends.. there’s just two”
“Yeah, my son just got one of those things… What are those things called?” He asked his question while making a hand motion that looked like he was dusting an imaginary tabletop with imaginary flour because he was about to roll out imaginary dough.

I just shrugged my shoulders because I needed at least a better clue than it’s a thing that could be obtained by his seventeen year old son.

“Those electronic things”

This time I turn my palms up while I raise my eyebrows – still not enough information.

“That holds the songs”

“An Ipod?”

“Yeah, an Ipod. He got this Ipod that will hold ten thousand songs. I don’t even know ten thousand songs!”

she said - he said

the story of the story of what my sister said her former student said to her

Nick called me after the ball game. He said “Hey, What’s up?” He didn’t know you had called me, and then told me that he was down in CT at one of the casinos the other day and someone asked “aren’t you Nick the muskrat?” and I felt pretty good because I was recognized and then at the game last night someone’s buying popcorn from me and asks “Hey, aren’t you Nick the muskrat?” and I felt even better but then he said he was your brother. Thanks.
it’s 1:03AM

I’m at the office

the second office

I drove from home at 12:04AM to the second office

I gathered up the work that has been collecting from Sunday, went up the stairs to my office and noticed my computer was on. I never leave my computer running.

It’s password protected.

I traveled around some blogs

Sometimes I just look at a post and decide not to read it, because I don’t want to get involved at the moment

I’ll look away in life too because I don’t want to get involved at the moment.

it’s 1:26AM

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

so, I was at the local professional ball field watching the local world champion's from rather pricey seats and I said to my buddy next to me that I know the guy selling the popcorn, I further explained that he is one of my sister's former students and that he has an association with professional wrestling and I told my buddy his ring name and that his real name is Nick.

I would tell you his ring name here but I would rather that it not show up in searches because most blogs, like this one, are lame and I really don't go around shouting that I have a blog to friends or family or associates. (and actually his name isn't Nick it's something else)

Anyway, I had just sat down in my prized seat as Nick was going by selling his popcorn and I missed my chance but he came back around during the sixth inning. I stood and called for the popcorn vendor.

"I'd like one" I said as I was peeling of a five and a single from my folded bills and Nick started to remove a bag from the stick that the bags were attached to and as he was busy I said "Hey, aren't you Nick 'the muskrat'?"

That's not his ring name I'm just using it as if it were and I really didn't want any popcorn but I wanted to surprise him. I'm glad he wasn't hawking the foam fingers.

Dude's face went blank and then his eyes got wide with surprise and then he looked confusion all before he said "Yes, I am" and then there was an awkward silence which I let linger.

I live for that awkward silence, I seek it out sometimes. I find it very amusing.

I handed him my six bucks for the four dollar bag, said thanks and made like I was about to sit back down all the while he's still in a bit of shock. Then I told him who I was and how I knew about him to which he gave me a sly smile, like he didn't believe me but he did ask me to say hi to my sister for him.

I then called up my sister.

"Hey, I just bought popcorn from Nick the muskrat"

She burst out laughing "So, you're at the ballgame?"


"Did you tell him who you were?"

"Eventually. He says hi"

Don't forget about the vendor at the ballgame story

Truly Yours,

Monday, August 01, 2005

You should pity me

So, I scored four more tickets to the local baseball team.

So, presently, I'm holding eight tickets, four for 8/2 and four for 8/20 and each one is a very good seat.

My friends and I are basically uneventful losers and it always amazes me that we always have a hard time scheduling card games or being able to go to the ball game.

For this Tuesday's night game I had to ask three different people before I could find someone to use the fourth ticket.

You should pity me.