Saturday, March 31, 2007

I know she's not the super bitch she pretends to be, so on her second day back I dropped in even though it was a Saturday. There were a couple hardcore regulars there and a couple casual regulars. I greeted them all by name just in case after six months at a different place she had forgotten.

She listened in on my cell phone call when it rang an hour and a half after I was there.

"Whose birthday is it?"

"Lady G's mother's." I said.

"You don't know your own mother in law's birthday? Sheesh. Men and birthdays."

I finished lunch and asked for my bill. I wondered as she ended up punching way too many keys at the register. I looked at the receipt, and of the four beers I ordered not one made it to the bill. I wrapped the slip around a twenty and placed it under my pint glass. It should have been twelve dollar tab.

I would have stayed longer but I had a phone call to make, wishing someone a happy birthday.
The trouble with living like there is no tomorrow is what's happens after you wake up the day after.

double space means new thought

I use the double space when … is too much to type.

Friday I was told that the sign would be up Saturday which meant that the domain name would be out in the public. I wondered if I looked as cool as the cucumber I was trying to portray. I really wasn't prepared to go live with the website. There wasn't anything majorly wrong it, it's just that I hadn't taken it through its final run through.

I asked if the domain name was setup so I could post to it, she told me it would be ready Monday and then she asked me what would happen it someone went to the domain name. I said they would probably see an 'under construction' page; so then she tried it.

I watched as she typed in the unique name and then hit the enter key. Low and behold my site popped up. She was looking at the screen, so I didn't have to disguise my eyes getting wide.

I updated it later in the day before the sign had a chance to get put up.

I designed the sign that went up too.

Friday, March 30, 2007

Prince Charming is my evil twin.

"What do you mean? I'm here all the time!"

Then there was a pause as the other person on the phone responded.

"Yes, that's where I am, out in the field fixing problems."

So are you either here or there? Because you can't be both.


I forget they hear most everything I say when I talking with my co-workers, so their judgments aren't just based on the interactions I have with them but also interactions I have with others.

I frequently try to offer the brighter side, the lighter side, the good side, the side of hope. I don't wish to have people ignore the bad; I just don't want them to forget the good. I'll also mention the bad when people start to bank on the good. Hoping for the best is good, just watch your back while you're doing it.

I mention the counter point, I guess - it's just that most of the people I deal with are very negative.


I was walking back to work and noticed her trying to hail a cab. I walked on my side of the street until I was perpendicular to her and started to jaywalked.

"You waving to me?" I asked.

I love dropping cheesy lines on them. They are always getting hounded by horny jackasses. I get a kick out of watching their expressions go from exasperated to friendly once they find out it's me. She smiled and hugged me the best she could with the bags in her hands. She asked me to see her later as she get into the back of a cab; she was off to finish a presentation for a one thirty meeting.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

I've been in the funk which I really don't understand. I can tell you when it started. I can't tell you why. I can't tell you why it hasn't ended.

I calculated my work load with the limited parking time I had. I had plenty of parking time and not much to do so I decide to work of that prototype mag netic page and cruise the internet.

It got to a point where I had to rush the things I was supposed to do. I was shutting things down when my cell phone rang. The caller told me she was looking for a full page ad for some private school and she was told that I was working on it. She wasn't surprised when I told her I hadn't a clue about what she was talking about. She then told me that she heard the owner was having me do too much.

The ad was to go to the printer in the morning. I got a little irritated. Firstly, because it looks like we don't know what we're doing. Secondly, because she a gossip in Gossipopolis. Thirdly, because she said she could do up an ad if I would just send her a logo.

I tried to call the owner without success. Print ads is what I do and lately, I've been doing them well. I hadn't a clue as to what the ad was for, whether it was a run-of-the-mill fundraiser, or some special event, or some dictation - all should get different style ads.

My irritation rose when all I could do was email a logo.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Remember this guy?

If you don't that's okay but he's been kicking around for awhile. He's something I did because I'm a goofball but I show him to you today because his clothes are magnets. He has a magnetic latex primer under his purple exterior. He pretty damn cool but the point is: his shirt is a magnet so it sticks to metal and stuff.

Stuff like a piece of watercolor paper primed up with magnetic latex primer.

quite average

I just noticed Post 2000

Three years sixty nine days give or take

Fifty one posts per month on average.

Twelve point four posts per week on average.

One and three quarters post per day on average.

I've seen better

I was having an early coffee break with my supervisor when my cell phone rang. I was asked to attend a meeting that was scheduled at ten. The asker was a boss five from the top. My supervisor is six from the top.

I don't do a lot of meetings. I'm usually squirreled away in some building's bowels making certain everything is easy to digest. The meetings I do do often come with little notice. I'm a cool cucumber so the powers-that-be know I won't get us in trouble and I'll get the story straight.

Before I left for the meeting, a boss three from the top came over talking on his cell phone with concerns about whether or not a detour map was in the hands of the person organizing the meeting. I interrupted his long winded call by stating that she told me she had the map and would be passing it out at the meeting.

I don't get to see a lot of other people's stuff so I was interested in seeing the map.

The contractors gave us a quick run down about schedules for when the bridge would be closed for repairs. It has been closed in the past. Nothing difficult but you do want your ducks in a row, then they passed out a detour map. I watched the small stack of papers make its way to me, three seats away, I recognized it. It was a map I made two years earlier, completely unchanged.

I've seen better.

I'm not kidding about the haircut

and a comb wouldn't hurt either.

and maybe some sleep

and a little less boozing

My worry in this picture is that I can't take a picture that I'll post. I think this was number eight.

The one by hand is actually better. The other is close but not close enough.

Unless you tout it as hand formed.

But that's a cop out.
There was a house side salad at my usual seat and some guy sitting towards the opposite end so I made my way to the short side of the L shape of the bar by the jager machine.

I was put on alert when I heard "Hey, honey. I saved you your seat." I've heard all those words before but I knew her greeting wasn't just for my benefit and she indicated that I should sit in the seat next to the side salad.

She came around from the bar and gave me a big long hug as whispered that she was glad I came in when I did. Before the hug was over an attractive brunette came in and asked where her loving was, I said "I'll be there in a minute."

For the next forty five minutes I played the roll of the bartender's boyfriend. It's not the first time, I've played that part. It's a part I'll play for an audience of one lone weirdo. Sometimes, the engagement will cause me to have an extended lunch break. Fortunately, I've never had to explain myself after returning late.

It's turns out the side salad was holding a spot for her sister. She ordered a turkey wrap which came with unwanted fries. She never ate the salad. Her and her sister did eat the fries. The guy repeated tried to strike up a conversation with her and she shut him down every time; he stopped trying after she nearly shouted, "I'm just trying to eat." She never did look at him.

He went back to talking to himself. He was rather large with long hair and a little unaware. The voices in his head kept the body they dwelled in fairly well shape.

Before the bartender's sister left, she wondered out loud whether she would be followed. I watched to make sure she wasn't.

It was a rather uneasy lunch. I never did order anything to eat; I just ended up drinking sodas for an hour. The mode changed for the better when a couple of long time regulars came in.

The guy left minutes later. I stayed around until I was fifteen minutes late. I left a ten and a slip of paper with my cell phone number on it.

"I don't want your money."

"It's the same ten you didn't take Saturday."

"I don't want it."

"Then throw it away. I don't think he will but my number's there in case he comes back. I'll be back after work."
Lately, I seem to just be. I'm just there.

What causes me a little concern is that my output hasn't changed for the worse. I think my work has gotten better.

Maybe the regular me gets in the way.

I know you must be wondering about the mag netic page. It has moved from the design stage, to the pre-production stage which means I bought some stuff.

I have the mag netic paint which is actually a primer coat so I bought paint for the top coat as well. I have appliance white if I wish to make the page look like a little refrigerator and I also have a gold metallic paint.

Paint tends to curl paper when it dries so I originally bought a stiff thin cardboard but then I got the idea of using watercolor paper. Watercolor paper is pretty stiff and it's made to get wet.

Isn't this all very interesting?

I figure that I will cut and punch the page to size before I paint it, mostly because I don't want to punch paper that has fine metal particles painted all over it in my three hundred dollar punching machine.

I really want the page to be as paper like as possible, so I'm going to try valiantly to get the watercolor paper to work. If it curls too much, I'll hold it as flat as possible with the blue painter's tape; it will then have a plain paper border but I can live with that.

I bought a small foam detail roller for applying the paint to the paper which should give a nice thin even coat.

In other news, I'm forgoing the staggered pages in that other document. The next plan is to thumb index it. I've picked up a crescent shaped punch as well as a round punch. I picked up a clamp to use as a stop for the round punch to keep the page at half circle or less than half circle distance.

This truly is a fantastic journey of a story.

I dropped over a hundred bucks at the craft store for supplies and tools. I have a hole drill which can drill a hole through twenty five sheets of paper. I also picked up something for bending wire which I will use for making small paper clips.

I plan on being world renowned for my paper skills and not just world renowned for that joke I told that still gets a few hits from folks searching for "joke" on yahoo. (I'm big in France.)

You can all say that you knew me when.
I really need to be lead by the hand sometimes.

I have trouble when things go well.

I need a haircut.

There is a serious concern on whether or not I'll make it to lunch. It's 11:28AM

Friday, March 23, 2007

I like saying bag balm

"I've asked everyone for a sample of their writing. Maybe, a report or a long memo. something like that"

A hint of worry crept in because I usually don't write long. Most folks don't want to read two or more pages, so I've routinely kept my business writings to one page. So I asked him if the writing could be in blog format.

(That is obviously untrue)

I was down for a third day in a row. I felt that I could pull myself out of my funk if I had wanted to but no effort was made for happiness.

That kind of hangs there, one end up in the air. I could finish it but I don't feel like it.

As she was bending over to pull four chilled pint glasses from the cooler, she noticed the waitress still standing there so she held up one finger and mouthed the words "one minute." Nicki had just gotten a rather large tattoo across her shoulders and wanted help putting some sort of balm on it.

"Michelle, if it helps out, I could rub ointment of Nicki's back for you, just if it helps though" I said. The regular next to me laughed, Michelle blushed a bit and Nicki commented on my kindness.

Monday, I think

Riding on the bus to get to the train that would take me home, the thought of just staying on came to mind. The bus was making its way to downtown. I thought of the things I could do and realized I wasn't going to do any of those things so I got off at the train station.

I had been at the real estate office. I hadn't been there on Sunday and even though I had just given fifty work hours when I normally only give twelve, I felt an obligation to go in and catch up on the two checks that I needed to write. Instead of going home for my truck, I just took public transportation. I figured that I had a monthly pass for unlimited bus and subway rides and I might as well use it.

I was asked if a scanned document can be modified from someone who is unfamiliar with the drag and drop method of copying a file to a different network drive. I told her it was possible but not easy.

I was called down to the main floor three times to help. I wondered if anyone realized that I wasn't even supposed to have been there. I'm a selfish needy prick sometimes.

I probably just needed a hug.


it's a one horse town with a one trick pony.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

He said that I can communicate very well graphically and then gave real world examples.

I thought that was cool.
So I feel I should show you something bound by wire.

I staggered the pages and printed on various types of papers.

I'm rather remarkable.

It has a sample of most of our marketing techniques: billboards, webpages, signs, banners, custom documents, all shrunk down to a half sheet of paper.
During the interview there was a battle to be interview correct or to be real. I think I ended up somewhere in the middle.

"I think this position better fits my job skills."

Even though that's 100% true, I feel a little dirty.

Trouble is: I'll leave a bigger hole than I'll fill.

She asked why I didn't do real estate full time. No benefits - money comes and money goes...

I remember when my soul outweighed my debt.

During the interview I was also asked about when I ran my own company.

"Well, not to be immodest but I was too much of a nice guy. I would charge people what I would pay to have the job done and I knew how to do the job, so I wouldn't charge much."
So, the owner of the bar changed up the schedule for the bartenders.

So, it is difficult to spend quality time with the ones I love which means I get just the normal amount of booze in my drinks.

I still get them quicker than the regular joe but still…

I got to see Jen tonight and she filled me in on some things. I'll have to bind her up a little something.

I haven't been there after work for over three weeks. I felt I was due even though I really didn't have the time.

Four beers and a regular sized Margarita and I was out the door. I'm at the real estate office now. The owner is downstairs. She's wearing her hair up. She should wear it down.

At least for me she should.

One of the bartenders thanked me for the chocolate covered strawberries. I was like "They weren't for you. You don't even really like those," in my head anyway. I later brought some other chocolate covered strawberries for the person I intended.

"Those were actually for Nicki. I don't think you really like chocolate covered fruit."

"I don't. I thought it was nice though. I actually gave half to Nicki."

People ruin my master plans all the time. But it worked out okay.

I think having a Public Transportation pass that's good for the bus and the subway might contribute to my drinking. I know it did tonight. The last subway is at twelve fifteen.

If I wire bind one thing a day for the next two years maybe I'll get my money's worth.

I also want to get a thermo binding machine. That's only a hundred bucks

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

paulina porizkova

So, today as I sit here, at my day desk, I can't believe I paid three hundred dollars for a binding machine. You would think that the hundred and thirty dollars that I had invested in Mega Millions, a week or two back, had paid off.

Well, anyway, if anybody wants anything bound by metal wire up to 125 sheets of paper - let me know

The thing of it is: if I had the dough to buy a perforator, I would. And not the kind that cuts little slits, the kind that cuts little holes like in a sheet of postage stamps.

I think I need help.

This post is a cry for help.

It's not in design where I rock; it's in bringing certain elements together in unique ways.

The mechanics.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007


phony filmstrip

I don't know how much you can do with square holes but I'm certain you will be seeing a lot of square holes.

Three Large

So, I've been doing more things in print design so I convinced myself that I needed a certain something. I'm a private contractor so if I want something, it comes out of my pocket. This left a dent.

It came today but to use it you also need something else and that something else will not be arriving until tomorrow so today I can only punch square little holes.

Monday, March 19, 2007

I have to remind myself not to go crazy.

One guy is still dragging his feet and the other is still making annoying noises.

My desk wasn't too out of place but then I didn't leave much available space. A stapler and a red pencil were somewhere I hadn't left them. I don't know how much stuff was stolen yet.

I don't feel like playing today, so short answers all around.

I'm okay with the web site so far.

Once I do a thing, it no longer impresses me.

It's no longer magic if I know the trick. I often miss the magic.

I told him that I was in the real estate office most every day for my vacation. He said "I can hardly wait to do something like that on my vacation."

There was a big political event this past Sunday. I think it's mostly irritating bullshit so I avoid it but others I know like it. I was asked to get her tickets, VIP tickets. My second hand clout got her on the VIP list but she wasn't treated as a VIP. She called me later that day to say that she was humiliated.

I didn't have much to say, assholes tend to be assholes and racists tend to be racists. "That's why I don't go to those things," didn't seem like it would have been a salve. I went back to reading my book after the phone call terminated.

I want to be angry but I know no good will come of that. It cost me a favor to get her on the list, I couldn't control what happened after that. There was no need for her to call me that day, there was nothing I could do nor anything I could have done different.


She came by the office and asked who was giving me Hersey's. I told her that I had lots of females giving me candy. I don't think she liked that too much. She asked because I saved a note. It said "Here's a Hersey's for you." I saved it because it reminds me of an honest fondness. It was written by the twelve year old daughter of a former co-worker.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

It will be way cool

I think I have figured out a way to insert a page that a magnet will stick to it. I'll have to try it out and see.

The plan is to get a thin piece of cardboard and spray paint it with the Krylon Magnetic Paint. I'll then glue a tab onto it that will be regular paper, which can be hole punched or stapled or whatnot.

Friday, March 16, 2007

"She called and quit. I don't know if you knew that."

I didn't.

She was young for her age.

it's a rollover in real life

Thursday, March 15, 2007

I can't tell you the last time I was patted on the head

I parked the Jeep after a cop made me move, for a brief moment I thought about explaining that I was merely waiting for a friend who was too drunk to drive but from the look of him he was in no mood for anything.

I was standing by the corner when she came out asking where her Timmy was. I was introduced to her friend Shannon, who turned out not to be the slightly overweight and unattractive black woman as I had guessed. Shannon was an attractive white woman in her early thirties.

I kept the charm on low.

On the way the Shannon house, Lady G fell asleep in the back; I worried how I was going to wake her, nearly every moment my attention wasn't required on the roadway or talking to Shannon.

Keeping the charm on low caused me to get a pat on the head from Shannon as she said good bye. I hoped the alcohol was to blame for that.

When I pulled into Lady G's parking lot I sort of jerked the Jeep a bit. If she was awake, at worse she thinks I stink at driving a stick shift and if she wasn't, the little jostle did the trick.

I got her upstairs and stayed at the door for our goodbye. I then walked the eight tenths of a mile to get her car and drive it back to her house. I had to pass through the theatre district which lately has had its musicals overshadowed by shootings and knife fights. I second guessed my choice of wearing a brand new leather jacket and calculated how much effort I would put up to keep it. I emptied the jacket contents into my pants pockets.

I got to the car without an event. I attributed that to good timing, it was still quite some time before the clubs had to close at two.

She called me the next day and asked how her car got to her house. She told me I was good.

Good? I'm damn good.

"You're a really nice guy," her friend said. "It's mostly just hype," was my reply.

A better shot of what I actually see from my chair

Ain't that always the way? Your cell phone rings at the most inopportune time. Mine was in my pocket as I was sitting with tiny screws and camera parts spread across the corner I cleared on the kitchen table.

It isn’t always the way, it just that you notice it more when it's inconvenient. And it was kind of my own fault anyway. She had called me earlier and mentioned that she might need a ride for her and her inebriated friend. As fate would have it, it was her camera that I had disassembled in front of me.

Fate has a habit of elbowing me in the ribs when I don't expect it and when I turn to say "What the fuck?" fate smiles back. I had just fixed the second problem on the camera or at least I thought I had when the call came in. My biggest worry was putting the screws back in the correct order.

I was rather proud of myself despite the missing screw. The camera had been dropped and the bit of plastic that holds the batteries in had broken off and was lost. I was able to drill the tiniest of holes and insert a carefully bent piece paper clip to act as a catch for the previously lonely latch.

The batteries then made proper contact but another problem arose. I was told that the mode ring was in a wrong position and every position I had tried made no difference. It was this problem that caused me to take the camera apart. Once it was apart, I found the smallest of ribbon cables leading from the mode ring disconnected. I figured out how to reconnect it and did so.

After all the screws but one were back in, the camera worked just fine.

I'll tell you the rest later, maybe.

A better shot of where the big tree lives.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

I disagree

So I was asked to change the icon for a pet frien dly home to something cutesy. Cutsey doesn't work with my ad and I don't think folks want cutesy from their real estate professional, they want professionalism.

that's a png foto - I'm learning new things.

Like I had nothing to do

Saturday, March 10, 2007

most of my life is just a note to self

I think I might survive, just seven more hours to go.

I have to get back to work on that webpage.

I need to come up with 36 more ideas for custom birthday cards.


company paper clips


I think one of my problems is that I don't have anyone to play off of, be it a foe or a mentor or someone to mentor.

I seldom do things just for me; I need a bigger purpose. Whenever I get involved in some big project I'll size everyone up and take a guess at who will last, who will survive; sometimes I'm wrong about people but mostly I'm one of the last standing, wondering what happened to all the young blood zeal.

Talk is cheap, and so is walking the walk when you've vowed to run.

point and click

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Are you being regaled yet?

So I got this idea and I figured I would share it with you all so I took a picture and you may now be wondering "Why is he showing use that stupid flyer in a plain manila folder?"

Well, I forgot to put something in the photo to show the scale even though the centimeters and inches can be seen, the thing is quarter sized.

I thought it was cleaver and I think you should think that as well.

And be regaled. Damn it!

some day...

Maybe I miss the old me; I got my coffee cream no sugar today.

I sometimes think better of the former me than I do of the present me but I'm certain he was prick-like too.


"What ya doing?"


"What's this?"

"Are you on crack?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That's what you implemented out on Main Street."

"I thought that was a one time thing."

"Why would we do up a standard installation plan if we where only going to use it once?"

"I don't know. The big boss will have to approve this."

"I've been told that he loves it and that he loves it so much that we have to modify it for narrow roadways because this won't work on narrow roadways."

"Oh, I didn't know. He don't tell me anything. I wasn't in that meeting."

I'm glad I have next week off.


He called to make certain everything was okay. He got a little worried when I hadn't showed up after work.


My sips appear to be consistent according to the rings in my coffee cup. The rings get slightly spaced more apart as they descend towards the narrower bottom.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

that's mighty slow typing

Why does it take four to six weeks to start a magazine subscription?

How hard is it to type a name and address into a database? Let's say that for some reason that the labels are printed a month in advance of the issue date, you could still print out special labels for new subscribers and slap them onto the soon to be back issues.

Who subscribes to magazines anyway?

Why does this week suck so much?

Amazon sometimes pisses me off, despite me being a shareholder and all.

Sometimes, when I'm dreaming, I'll be reading a book and I wonder where that plot and those characters have come from. I've read poetry in my dreams as well, I should write those things down. Sometime, when reading these dream novels, an out of body type experience takes place where I'm looking over my own shoulder while I read and the looking me will say "You know you're making that story up as you go. You're writing it just as you read it" and then the words will start to fade from the page and I'll wake up.

Someone was being a joker. That's not intersection #666. That's not even a bad intersection; there are far more hellish than that.

my piratic ways

Lyle Lovette makes me smile. I think he's funny and he was a welcomed listen after the new addition of Lucinda Williams.

I haven't been really enjoying my music selection as of late so I went to Amazon and bought some other CD's; Lyle Lovette was in the mix along with a couple books on design.

I was lying in bed mentally fighting with myself to get up and on with the day when I remembered that I hadn't emailed the ad to the publisher.

I was only ten minutes late to the day job.


It was an easy night mostly because I had the redesign started and done prior to the due date; that's not normal even though that is what I prefer.

After the ad was done, I worked on another custom birthday card for Lady G and this one was nice. Well, nicer.


I have a redesign for that blue brochure.

Everything I do seems to be a work in progress.

I never seem to be completely satisfied.


Hand stitched booklet - will be one birthday card.


I've never been a fan of just 'yelling out' in the office, even though a normal speaking voice can sometimes be heard rather easily.


Your love is a lie if it is ever overcome by hate.


I know this site is read for bits of information that would never be know otherwise so here's another bit: the trick to replacing the water cooler bottle is to start pouring the water into the cooler hole and to just quickly continue to turn the bottom side up.

There is also a trick to pouring from one of those square gallon cans when it's full, that trick is to keep the spout at the highest point when pouring which will eliminate that glug glug because air will be able to easily enter the can as the fluid escapes. But it is a little tricky to precision pour that way because the spout will be further away but just suck it up and stop your whining.

That about sums up what I have learned in my years here on Earth.

And that piratic is a word.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

For some reason I thought waterproof paper would be alright in an inkjet printer. It did print out just fine but it refused to dry.

The map wasn't revised too much; three developments were added and I changed the style on the numbering system.

The owner is going to give them out to other sets of people, as well, so we'll at least get some more play out of them.


She told me she was angry with me. She thinks I forgot about her.

I haven't forgotten, I just haven't done anything to let her know I have remembered.


I always think that I can win you back. That's how much I believe in my charm; which makes me a bit of a sleaze.


We're going with the new ad. I would really like to know who the unbelievers are; I'll have to ask.




CMYK is color for printing
RGB is color for displaying


“For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul?”

Monday, March 05, 2007

I still don't know shit

Two ad books from 1994 were sitting around. That version was the fourth year I was involved in it. I wondered how good I was as a designer back then so I thumbed through it.

I could count eighty three ads that were mine. I liked twenty one of them. I had some trouble identifying all the ones I did; some of them used techniques I wasn't aware that I knew back then.

I would go too big and use too many typefaces in the same ad back then.

Almost all the informational pages were good. I rocked them.

Thirteen years is a long time ago. I didn't know shit but it was a pretty good job for a run of the mill office printer and an early version of CorelDRAW. It was short notice too.

I still don't know shit.

Mostly while watching Scooby Doo

Twelve hours on Saturday, eight on Sunday - that's half a normal work week. Your really should start tearing up a little bit for all my woe.

Yesterday was a custom map for some big shots. It's a really nice map after the revisions that I have in my head are made.

It has a strange feel to it, not unpleasant but different. I don't know if you have every felt that waterproof/tearproof paper but it was sort of like that.

Note to self: buy some of that waterproof/tearproof paper.

It's ideas like that that make me seem like a genius and you really should thank me for letting you go along for the ride.

I've been printing everything out to fit on a 4x6 inch piece of photo paper because I have so much of that paper that I don't need (it comes free with the ink) and because it's cool. I highly recommend that you print out all your stuff to that size. You'll be cool like me if you do.


I was asked to modify that pet related icon. I was asked to replace the paw print with an actual photo of a dog. I think this is a mistake. I don't think people want cutesy from their real estate professionals, they want business chic.

I seem a little weird today. My sardonic nature is manifesting itself more than usual. Usually, I keep the levels down in my writing.

I think I'm going to use 'business chic' in a conversation. "Listen, we've got to go with business chic. Nobody's doing it. We'll be the first. People will copy us."

Modish too.

"This ad has a modishness to it that you don't see anywhere else."


So, on some opening page it asked "Are the Shins the best band ever?" to which I raised an eyebrow because on an impulse I had picked up their latest CD just one day prior and I really wasn't impressed with it. But I'm an open minded type of fellow in a hard set kind of way so I listened to the CD again and the answer to that question is no.


"He's the type of guy that gives hotheads their hot heads."


"Hey, do you know that a wheel has fallen off of that chair?"


"A wheel has fallen off." I said as a pointed to where it was missing. He leaned over to look at the missing wheel which caused him to tip over which was the exact reason why I pointed. He never thinks about that step ahead.


I'll be sitting at my desk wishing not to be there and then I'll hear the Siren call of those potential days off.

"Come on just two days. You won't be missed. What are you saving them for? You're not going to go anywhere. Take the days. It will do you good. You need some time away. You deserve some time away. It will do you good."

Having a goodly amount of vacation time on top of a few personal days while having no life is sometimes tough.


The burst of design ideas all started with a $120 printer. It makes me wish I had some real talent.


"Smooth cut, Junior." Who critiques a movie they are watching in their own living room like that?

I also say "Who's the sound editor?" and "What, no one was doing continuity that day?"

Also, "I don't believe it. No one would say that; ever. Who wrote this?"

Mostly while watching Scooby Doo.

Saturday, March 03, 2007

I've always like the color of rust.


I got nothing. I've been here thirteen hours.

I'm typing this right from Blogger so I'm not going to spell check.

I like living on the edge sometimes.

Twenty banners, a few photos with someone else's camera, a floating bolt 'picture,' I hope there's more but that's what I remember for now.

I think we've started to kick ass again.

"Too modern" was some of the feedback on the ad redesign. I had wished they had said that to me. I owner likes it though so... and if she didn't I would have made a stand. Se heard a little of it anyway.

"If you go with that ad, you'll have the most contemporary ad in the whole paper and it's totally unique. Once you have the listing you're not selling to owners anymore, you're selling to buyers and those are two different sets of people."

"I know. I agree and I'd tried to explain that to them..."

You can't sell high end properties using old world traditions.

The ad's not even edgy and it uses normal looking typefaces and the predominate color is a muted green. Babies! I say.

I'm still rather conservative.

I kind of think it's funny though because I was going to leave a note to the owner saying that I didn't she had the balls to use it

Here's more bolts for you.

I put this on my scanner bed and pushed play

I wish I had a crate of thinking caps

It's before eight on a Saturday so it's not unexpected that I beat everyone in. The first person arrives at about quarter to nine and attempts to shut off the already shut off alarm system. I shut out that it's already off before she can enter in the fourth number that will actually set the alarm. I didn't bother to explain that when there is not an irritating tone going off when you enter the door that the alarm is off.

She left and then at nine an office assistance came in and called out to see of anyone was about because the alarm was off. I yelled out an "Hello."

She walked up stairs where she found me sitting in my office with the blinds up but no overhead lights on. "Do you want some light?" she asked.

Yeah, could you help me out with that? I'm having trouble figuring out the light switch.

for your regalement...

I doubled parked in front of the coffee shop; only the owner recognizes me anymore, the staff I knew has moved on but then I guess so have I, maybe not so much on as out. They still have mighty fine coffee and every casual chance I get, I'll buy my coffee from them.

It's been eleven years since I stood in their line on a regular basis; things have changed. I was watching the lady with the fur coat enter the house across the street; she was also from my past. "Can I help you?" brought me back to the present. I ordered a jumbo cream no sugar which was what my order was eleven years ago. I guess my mind didn't make it all the way back to 2007 because I usually get it with sugar now.

I got to the second office by quarter to eight. I wasn't asked or expected to be there but I felt that I just had to do something; I was having too many ideas just to keep them in my head. I had a need to get some out.

I'm working out of two offices at the moment. I've moved the essentials over to the front office while most of my supplies and infrequently used equipment is still in the back office. I'm trying to keep the new office organized.

I set my coffee down on the new cutting mat I bought for my new desk and them walked to the back office to grab some napkins to use as a coaster. I cracked the plastic lid off getting ready to add some sugar that I keep around for when I make tea before I took a sip.

I've changed the way I drink my coffee a few times, usually I'll drink it the same as someone else that I'll usually have coffee with just to make the ordering easier and then the coffee shop just keeps making it that way for you.

I don't have too many strong preferences.

That first sip was good, though. I might just change my standard order.

my life gave me this tie

it's a kurt douglas movie

I keep on getting whistling noises from my bells.


I'm truly NOT impressed.

So, I listen to the thing or see the trick that is supposed to be awe inducing and I'm like:


I've very dismissive sometimes


So, he comes by my desk and starts asking all these foolish questions like: "Do you remember last Tuesday?"

I didn't answer any of them.

That's one of my pet peeves. I would rather just hear the bottom line question and not all the superfluous bullshit.

I had half turn to look at him while he interrupted me but after stupid question number three I turned back around while I asked "What's your question?"


Last night I felt I should write something for this site, even though I had just posted a thing or two, even though a bunch of what was posted was, indeed, written words. I felt I was being neglectful, somehow.

I'm still not certain who or what I was neglecting.

Maybe I was just jonesing for writing because what I did post was written a day prior.


If you tell me a story where some donkey does some jackass thing, you're not going to get much of a reaction from me because a jackass being a jackass isn't news.

In fact, I maybe slightly irritated that you just wasted my time.

In other news: it was raining heavily and I got wet. You see what I mean? Where's the story in that?


Lonely Are the Brave

Thursday, March 01, 2007

4 quarters

This one's green

So, I got another mini flash drive; the two gig version this time. You must have know it was just a matter of time.

Hey, it was on sale. What could I do but buy it?


I walked in last night and was presented with three problems before I even rounded the front desk. I did my best to brush them off. When a grabbed the spare key to my new office the owner told me that everyone liked the signs. I told her that I read black is the new black for the up coming year. She then told me that they showed the signs to a design company and they liked them too; I sort of brushed that off too.

It's nice that a design company would say my work is good but were they just being kind? Were there any qualifying statements like "these are good considering..."


I've been charged to redo one of our weekly ads.


I spent $1.87 on a grande size coffee from the Starbucks on the way and walking across the plaza I wondered how I would react when someone would refer to my coffee as 'high test.'

"Hey, you bought high test today."

"When the last time you had a coffee from Starbucks?"

"Me? Never. But my kids tell me that it's high test. It's what they have out in California."

It was my direct supervisor. I did my best not to roll my eyes in a way he would notice.

Listen, I'm not really paying very close attention to this life

He asked what I made a year and I was quiet as I put my mind to the task of multiplication, only I couldn't remember what I made a week.

He then asked what my net worth was which produced more silence. "Do you have a lot of stuff?" he asked. "Yeah, but it's not worth much if you have to resell it," was my answer.

I think I gave him my correct date of birth, though.

Sometimes, I say mean things

"If you ask him what side of the bed he got out of he'll say the wrong side."

"If you ask me what side of the bed I got out of I'll say ask your wife."