Those losers at the bar envy me

I would give him something that he needs to do his job and he would say “You’re a nice guy,” and that always bothered me; so now when he says that I’m a nice guy, I say “No, I’m a professional.”

Doing your job doesn’t make you a nice guy.


I don’t know why but I started planting things.


Frequently all that I need to do makes me forget all that I’ve already done.


I’m trying not to be so lazy – lazy by my standards.


I told her that I wouldn’t be sticking around after work. She told me that she would be in tomorrow at 4pm. So, on Saturday at 4:45pm, I walked through the door. I tried to order a beer but after too many questions, I said “Fine, I’ll go straight to the Vodka drinks.”

I have my favorite seat but sometimes I’ll move so that more people will sit at the bar. The third move put me next to a regular that I didn’t recognize.

“Aren’t you Tim?” he asked.

“Yes, I am.”

“The last time I saw you, I think I you bought a pretzel for {one of the bartenders}.”

I thought back to the last time a bought a pretzel, it was awhile ago, before I confirmed his thinking.

“I’m a Tim, too.”

I offered my hand and said “Nice to meet you, Tim.”



Later, the bartender he was referring to asked if I would run over and get her a pretzel, which I did.


After my fifth pint of whatever she was serving me, I asked to settle up. The bill she gave me totaled $18.50. I’ve seen her charge $14 for just one of what I was drinking, so I folded two twenties into the receipt and placed it on the far edge of the bar. I have an informal rule that I can't leave too much more than twice the bill; if I think more compensation is required than it gets delivered in gifts.

She handed a twenty back as she asked “Timmy, what are you doing?”

“What? I’m going to leave a two dollar tip?”

Then she leaned a little closer and got a little quieter and said “Sometimes, I just like it when you visit.”