I listen to him because he drives me crazy. He's a deep bruise on my forearm that I just can't help poking.

He's a fine example of a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. It seems like he's trying to win friends by saying all that he knows, trouble is - what he says is untrue. He makes conclusions on half truths and soft facts.

His words are a rope and he has a habit of talking to noose makers.

He's that car wreck that you drive by slowly wishing not to see what you hope to see.


My quote of the day was:

Life is not holding a good hand; Life is playing a poor hand well.
- Danish proverb

I read that and thought "Mmmm, danish."


...

So, here's a story about how awesome I am. I try not to tell my stories of awesome for varied reasons, one being that most of them are truly unbelievable and would be deemed* works of fiction another reason is because it would soon get very old and repetitive unlike the tasty nuggets I usually leave.

I've heard that rabbit dropping come in two varieties: one that should be throw into the garden because rabbit turds are the best turds for the garden and the other kind is a kind that the rabbit can munch on later. I don't know if it's true, I only know that I've heard it somewhere. "Heard" could mean read, as well.

Anyway, back to my story of awesomeness.

I'm a bit gruff sometimes in the second office, it's kind of by design so folks don't bother me unless they really need to bother me. The query was made for a disk and the query went unanswered from the crowd then the query was made at me. I asked floppy or CD. I was told CD and then I showed off my cool tiny flash drive.

"I should get one of those." the query maker said, meaning a flash drive not particularly a tiny one. I agreed with her. I told her I had CD's in my office so she followed me upstairs.

Once upstairs, I closed the door and told her that these CD's were purchased by me, with my own money and that there would be a price to be paid. She asked about the price. I said it could only be paid in the absence of pants as I reached for my dictionary.

None of that paragraph above is true.

Once upstairs, I was deciding which type of writable CD to give her when I spied an unopened flash drive that I bought awhile ago but never used.

"Can your computer use a flash drive, now?"

"Yes, both the one downstairs and the one at home."

"Here, you can have this one but you won't be getting anything from me for Christmas if you take it," I said as I cut open the package and handed her the 512MB drive with the instructions.


*look up word deemed later and try not to be slightly disappointed with what's there.