Ever see one of those movies where there comes a point where the normal everyday good guy who is forced to fight the ultimate evil guy has a gun pointing right at the ultimate evil guy and the ultimate evil guy tries to talk he way out of the situation by saying to the normal everyday good guy that the normal everyday good guy doesn’t having killing in him, the normal everyday good guy is just too good to kill and then the normal everyday good guy agrees with the ultimate evil guy’s point and lowers the gun and then stuff happens and the evil guy gets away only to be gotten some other way?
If I was ever in that situation and I was the normal everyday good guy and had the gun pointed at the ultimate evil guy’s head and he started with the 'you're too good routine', I would listen to his point while I casually checked the safety, I wouldn’t have to worry if there was a round in the chamber or if the hammer was back because I would have already taken care of that as the gun barrel was making it way to line up with his head, then I would make like his point was getting to me, like maybe I didn’t have killing in me and I would lower the gun a bit but what I would actually be doing is lowering my aim to his chest, closer to center mass, and I would then go over in my mind that the Pledge of Allegiance is said with your right hand over your heart which puts your heart off center to your left and that his left is opposite my right, so aim a little off center of his chest to my right and then I would slowly squeeze the trigger which is actually something very hard to do when you have a target lined up, the impulse is to pull the trigger but that pulling motion can jerk the gun just enough to make you miss your target so you have to squeeze and it sometimes seems like your squeezing forever and then there would be a flash of the muzzle and then a small hole would be blown into the front of the ultimate evil guy’s chest and a lot larger one blown out the back.
And there would be no real investigation because I’m a good guy and the bad guy needed killing.
And then I would have regret, regret so strong that I might not be able to function effectively for quite some time and friends would be reassuring me that I did the right thing, that I had no choice. But the regret would remain because the regret wouldn’t be there because I killed a man but because I killed a man so calmly and coolly, so determinedly, easily pushing my sense of right and wrong aside. It wouldn’t be the wrongness of the thing that bothers me, I would be bothered by the fact that wrongness was so welcomed.
Which is probably why I stopped my fist fighting at one, there was a desire to hurt when hurt wasn’t necessary.
It must have been my father that taught me gun safety, it may have been my uncle, one rule is never point a gun at something you aren’t willing to kill, whether you think the gun is loaded and/or ready to shoot or not and that would have been the ultimate evil guy’s mistake. I would have already decided on the killing part the moment I pointed the gun at him.
He was already dead.
He should have either ran or rushed me for the gun.
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