Tuesday, December 07, 2010

I believe 'Down the Chimney' is the same as 'In the Breezer'.

Into her right ear, he whispered that he loved her completely.

He felt her lower her gaze as she whispered a plea in return.

“Please don’t trust me with your whole heart yet.”

I usually have the luxury of having my questions answered without having to ask them.

I had the time and the money so I walked across the street, was greeted by a regular who was smoking, and was told the name of the bartender that was working. I told the regular that his news was welcomed because she was the one I was there to see.

It wasn’t my regular bar but it was one of my regular bartenders. I haven’t been getting out much; I had been telling myself that I was too busy, but sometimes you have to make your presence known.

The bartender told me that a bartender at my regular place was let go. I knew she was gone but I thought she was the one that made the choice. I was then told that one of bartender/managers was let go as well.

The two people that were let go were the only two reasons, I was still going there.

“Well, I guess I have no reason to go back.”

"Yeah, you sure don’t. Now you get to visit me more.”

“Yeah, I sure do.”

I hung around awhile talking with the regulars that I knew and getting to know the regulars that I didn’t; because I’m rather charming, you know.

I had been going to the other place for a very long time. I had seen dozens of bartenders come and go but there were always at least two bartenders that perpetuated my legendary status.

The last two had just left. I guess it’s the end of an era.

I’m certain that the new place will work out.

She said, “Wanting to fuck her brains out,” didn’t count as being interested in her mind.

“Hey, did I ever tell you why Mrs. Claus doesn’t have any children?”

“No, I don’t think so,” I replied with a little bit of dread.

“Well, Mrs. Claus can’t get pregnant because Santa only comes once a year and when he does, it’s down the chimney.”


m said...

I have to tell that joke. It really did make me giggle.

Green Catfish said...

A lot of that guy's jokes are funny not because the joke in itself is funny but that he has enough guts to tell them.

He loves calling me in work (he's a former coworker who retired at 55) and saying all these ridiculously crude things to me to which he knows I cannot reply to because at least three other people can hear my end of the conversation.