Saturday, November 18, 2006

Another goodbye at the bar


I hadn't been seeing much of her, her shift was changed and my drinking has been on the decline.

I first met her when I was trying to buy one last shot for my normal gang of bartenders. They were placing shots in front of me every time they decided they wanted one, I think we were up to three or four when I decided to have one last one and then find my way to the subway station. I couldn't get anyone of the bartenders I knew to do one with me and I think I did what ever it is that a manly man does that's equivalent to a pout, or maybe I just whined. I forget, but anyway after I asked for the second time, Jen said "Lan na will do one with you," I remember thinking "I don't want Lan na to do one with me. I want you to."

I guess I get pouty when I'm drunk.

Anyway, the scene I remember is that Jen poured the shots, handed one to me and then called to Lan na and said "Here do this with him," as she pointed at me. Lan na then saluted with her shot in my direction. When we both were finished she said "By the way, I'm Lan na," and laughed.

I saw her the following week and we talked a bit. After that, I would make it a point to occasionally stick around until her shift would begin at eight on Friday nights. I got to see her approximately once a month.

I would always get a large greeting from her and one day when she saw me she pulled a hard covered book out of her backpack and said "Here, I got this for you. I've been carrying it around for two weeks," it was a book of works from various print designers. I had little choice but to love her.

For the last few months, her shift was changed to Thursday nights, a night I work at the second job, so I hadn't been able to see her. Two weeks ago, when I was celebrating Veteran's Day with Jen, she told me Lan na gave her two week notice and that her last day would be November 16.

Last night was November 16th. I finished the second job by 10PM and drove home. I was literally pulling into my driveway when I got a call from Lady G; her kids had just been in a car accident eight blocks from my house, she asked me to met her at the scene. Everyone was alright, the car suffered a busted up passenger side front. I took some photos and then followed them all home.

I told Lady G how I thought the insurance companies would call the accident: bottom line the other guy ran a stop sign. We talked a bit, she gave me a leather coat as part of the 40 days of birthday celebration and I left.

I glanced at the radio clock the blue LED's indicated that it was seven minutes until eleven. It started to rain. Lady G lives pretty close to my bar. I still had a box of Godiva Truffles in the back of the truck from some recently failed surprise. I drove to the bar.

I thought the place was crowded for a rainy night and I looked through the window before I went in to make certain she was working. I had my license in hand as I approached the bouncer outside the door. He glanced down at it but wouldn't take it, he said "You're all set," I smiled and thanked him. I then took a step up towards the door and heard "There's a five dollar cover." I was reaching into my coat pocket where I had placed a twenty for just this charge when the bouncer behind me said "Kevin, he's all set." I turned and thanked him again.

It was a struggle to get to the bar and it was even harder trying to catch a bartender's attention. Their eyes would never make it past the first row of patrons. I remember thinking that every one at the bar was an asshole and patted myself on the back for always making room for someone to get to the bar when I'm seated at it.

But my good bar manners weren't getting me any closer to who I wanted to see so I was devising another plan when I saw Lan na make a move towards the pass thru.

The pass thru is located to the left of the taps and no customer is supposed to be in that area because that is where the waitresses pick up and place their orders. But I'm special, I get certain allowances and most of the staff knows me by name. I matched Lan na's progress to the pass thru. I thought she was going to the lady's room which would have caused her to pass right by me but she just ended up grabbing some silverware and turned back so I called her name.

The wait staff was generous in sharing their space with us.

"I hear it's your last day."

"How'd you hear that?"

"I've got people looking out."

"Yeah, it is. I figure it's time to move on become more stable and to procreate."

"Well, I've got something for you." I handed her the large gold bag with the two toned box of varied chocolate truffles. Other than a smile I ignored her 'procreate' remark, although it was difficult.

"You know? These folks don't care it's my last day," she said as she pointed with her chin towards everone at the bar. "Thank you. I haven't been getting to see you lately."

"Yeah, Thursday is tough for me. And I'm glad I could make it. I didn't think I would."

We were interupted by Jen screaming "Timmy!” from the other side of the pass thru, "You drinking?"

"No, I'm driving," I said as I looked Lan na in the eyes for the first time that night. They looked a little glassy and a bit tired. I was going ask how she was doing when I heard Jen yell something again.

"Are you working tomorrow?"

I apologized with a half shrug to Lan na before I yelled back "Yeah."

"Are you coming by?"

"I don't know. Jill won lunch for ten friends."

"Oh, that's okay. I don't need to see you every Friday."

"So if I wanted to catch you here, Friday night is best?" Lan na asked.

I wanted to tell her that I'm not around much anymore but I just agreed. She then left to get a pen and pulled some receipt paper from the register. She gave me her phone number and handed me a small piece of receipt and asked for mine.

I turned a bit to write on the counter by the mostly unused coffee maker. It was too dark to see what I was writing so I wrote by feel. Once I was done I held it up to the light.

"Can I read it?" Lan na asked as she closely looked over my shoulder while placing her right hand on my right lower back.

"I can," I said as I handed it to her.

She hugged me a third time as we said good bye.

On the way out I caught that bouncer's eye as he was checking ID's and thanked him once again.

Walking back to my truck in the stillness that happens after a hard rain I could smell her perfume on me and I felt certain I wasn't going to see her again.

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