“I bet you didn’t expect to see me here,” was how she greeted me but I did actually know that she was going to be there because I was there yesterday. They all know I have my favorite even though I’ll never admit it.
I told her that I actually did know she was going to be there and I told her why I knew. She’s a smoking hot Brazilian and she’s number two on my favorite’s list.
After a few minutes she said, “I was kind of crank yesterday to everyone. I think it was because I was about to get my period,” and then the waitress said, “Yeah me too. Everything was bothering me, yesterday.”
A few minutes after that the waitress leaned over and said, “Do you know what bothers me? It when I learn over the table to serve the beers and I hit the table,” she said as she looked down at her chest, “Right where some guys hand is and he doesn’t move he hand out of the way. Do you think he leaves it there on purpose?”
“Yes he does. And he’ll probably brag about it when he gets back to the office as well.”
I forget what she said after that but I then said that if the guy wasn’t looking her way then it could be an honest mistake but that if it happened every time then he’s definitely doing it on purpose.
“So, he’s just trying to cop a feel? Right?”
“Yes”
…
My safe word is: “Knock it off, you dumb ugly bitch.”
And then sometime later, “Hey baby, you know that’s just my safe word.”
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